Me. At least after what I've been through.
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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