Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Randomize
