are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
