Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
time to smoke my breakfast
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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