it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
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