thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
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