it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
