Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
