There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
