just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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