She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
