I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
