i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
