So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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