Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Randomize
