i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
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