she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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