I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
