There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
the day after is always just damage control
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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