Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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