dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
