Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize