Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize