Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
