dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
