im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize