At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize