So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
