babies were throwing up all over the place
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
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