i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
