Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
i think im in europe. pls send help
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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