butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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