They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
