I'm lost and stupid without you.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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