You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize