shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Randomize