if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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