so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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