my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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