i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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