Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
