Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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