you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
even my farts smell like vagina
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize