She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
How's work?
Spinning.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
