Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize