Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
