i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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