he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Come on in and take your pants off
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