Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
