I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
