she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
